What Your Sleeping Position With Your Partner Says About Your Relationship

The Spoon

According to a study done by relationship psychologist Corrine Sweet, the position is only adopted 18 percent of couples and demonstrates a dynamic in which, “ One partner takes a protective stance over the other.”

The Loose Spoon

The loose spoon is typically what couples eventually do once their relationship matures and each individual wants to revert to a position that produces the best quality sleep, said Paul Rosenblatt, author of Two in a Bed: The Social System of Couple Bed Sharing.

It’s like the big spoon saying, “I’ve got your back, you can count on me,” but it’s not as sexual as spooning closer, he said.

The Chase

This is like spooning, but it’s when one person is in pursuit of the other. One person has drifted to the other side of the bed, and the other one is “chasing” them.

This can mean two things. One that the person who is being chased wants to be pursued, or is playing hard to get.

The other thing it can be, according to Samuel Dunkell, author of Sleep Positions: The Night Language of the Body is something called “illegal Spooning” because the person has retreated because they want space.

The Nuzzle 

This is a very nurturing posture that creates a sense of protection. Shirley Glass, a psychologist and martial therapist, also notes, “There’s a high level of trust here,” as this snuggling position has a “strengthening sense of comradeship and protection.”

The Back Kissers 

If you sleep back-to-back but you touch with your bums or backs, this is a good thing.

According to relationship psychologist Corrine Sweet, this means, “Both partners are relaxed and comfortable with one another.” 

The Liberty Lovers

If you and your partner sleep facing opposite directions with space in-between ­– This is actually a good thing.

According to a study done by relationship psychologist Corrine Sweet, couples that sleep back-to-back without touching are “connected and secure in themselves. This position shows both closeness and independence in the relationship.”

27 percent of couples prefer this sleeping style.

The Tangle 

Some couples maintain this intense position throughout their relationship but it isn’t necessarily a good thing. According to Elizabeth Flynn Campbell, a New York psychotherapist, “[the couple] could be overly enmeshed, too dependent on each other to sleep apart.”

The Unraveling Knot

This position starts with The Tangle position, but then unravels after 10 minutes or so.

This position is a sign of a stronger relationship than The Tangle. Yet only eight percent of couples do this. 

The Space Hog

If a partner takes the “starfish position,”  this means that they tend to be selfish — especially if they begin to push the other partner so they’re hanging off the bed! 

If this is happening in your relationship, it’s time to have an honest conversation.

You can also tell who is dominating a relationship by where their heads are when they sleep.

When a couple’s heads are right next to each other, it means they are equal.