- Publish Date
- Saturday, 23 December 2017, 1:19PM
WARNING: Graphic content.
What makes sex truly unforgettable?
As someone who has written about sex for three decades, I have heard quite a few 'best sex ever' stories – ranging from sweet and relatively tame to torrid and totally out there.
In the spirit of end of the year 'best of' lists, here's a sample of what people have told me when asked to look back at a lifetime of intimacy and 'fess up the best, naughtiest moments of all.
I had an affair
"It's not very popular to say, but I'm sure it's the case with a lot of people that the best sex they ever had was affair sex.
"I had the affair with a male friend of mine and when we finally kissed each other after years of trying to deny the attraction, it was simultaneously the best thing I have ever experienced and the worst. I loved my husband but was bored sexually. He is gentle and I didn't want more of the same.
"My friend sensed I liked him being more dominant and I remember the first time we knew it was going to happen, he picked me up from the sofa, walked with me in his arms into the bedroom, threw me on the bed (literally) and then he stood in front of me and undressed.
"'His body is tremendous. My husband's isn't bad and I liked the softness of his belly against me at night, but this guy was lean and taut. It was all about contrast, right from the start.
"When people are discovered having affairs and they've chosen a carbon copy of their partner, I'm like 'What the hell? Why would you do that?'
"The affair made me feel alive. That was the over-riding emotion. Any wife with kids will tell you that, as much as you adore your children, they sap the life out of you with the necessary but relentless routine and drudgery and monotony of parenthood. I don't resent my kids or husband for making me feel like that. I love being a wife and mother. But this spoke to a part of me that had been buried for a long time."
I tried BDSM
"I know my husband watches BDSM when he watches porn, so I told him I wanted to turn him into my sex slave for a day.
"He was all for it so I really went for it! I ordered him to go into the closet and get a bag I'd put in there. Inside it were some stockings of mine (worn so they smelt of me), nipple clamps, a scarf, lubricant, and a selection of sex toys. We'd never experimented with any toys before, so this alone was risqué for us.
"I made him sit on the chair and I tied him to it using the stockings. I tied his arms first and then decided to tie his legs as well: one leg to each leg of the chair. Then I tied the scarf around his eyes as a blindfold. He protested and said he wanted to see but I ordered him to be quiet and to only speak when spoken to.
"I took my robe off and moved naked around him, letting him smell me. Then I pushed my naked body against him and ordered him to smell and bite whatever I put in front of him. It was incredibly intense and arousing, teasing him like that."
I went to a sex club
"I'd been trying to talk my boyfriend into going to a swinger's club for years. I could see the idea appealed, but he was paranoid people would find out (he's a teacher) so I found out where a good sex club was when we went to America.
"A few drinks in, I was dancing with some guy who started feeling my breasts and kissing my neck. I could see my boyfriend dancing with a girl who was rubbing his penis through his jeans. This meant I had permission to go further so I allowed it.
"We had sex with each other in full view of others and he went down on me while a girl was kissing me, but we drew the line at that.
"That night kept us hot for each other for years afterwards."
I had a threesome
"I'm a travel consultant and spend my life travelling and checking out high end resorts for clients. I was sent on one trip that included sailing for three days.
"The minute I got on board and saw the two guys who were crew, I thought 'My God'. I was by far the youngest and most attractive of our group and they started flirting with me immediately. I got in the habit of going for drinks with them when we stopped overnight to stay in resorts and then the last night we ended up back in my room.
"I only did it once. An encore wasn't necessary.
"It was obvious they'd planned how to seduce me. Both of them sat beside me on the sofa and the younger guy said, 'Come on, give me a little kiss. You're leaving soon,' and he grabbed me and gave me a big tongue kiss. I kissed him back and then the older guy, sitting on the other side, said, 'That's so unfair. What about me,' and pulled me to him and so I kissed him as well.
"When we stopped kissing, the young guy grabbed me again and we kissed then I leant back into his arms and he started kissing my neck and feeling my breasts and the older guy put his hands on my hips and pulled me towards him and next thing we'd all moved to the bed and both of them were making love to me.
"I wasn't shocked or surprised: I think I'd given the green light the second they came back to the room. I'd always wanted to have a threesome and this was perfect. They were handsome and fun, the sex was fantastic - best of all, I'd never see them again."
I seduced my flatmate
"I rented out some rooms for a while and he was the third flatmate I'd had. He was very, very good-looking but 18 and painfully shy. I was 22 and quite the opposite.
"The writing was on the wall from the start and my other geeky flatmate looked a bit disconcerted by the obvious sexual tension and stayed away even more than usual.
"We stayed up late one night and got drunk and he started telling me about his life and that he'd never had a girlfriend and was a virgin.
"I was shocked. He was shy... but, a virgin? Looking like that?
"I've never had any fantasies about seducing a virgin but there was something irresistible about him and he knew I was tempted.
"He started flirting and saying 'Maybe you could teach me about sex' and then another night we ended up tipsy and I led him into my bedroom and let him give me oral sex. He wasn't very good at it but it was one hell of a turn on knowing he'd never, ever done it before.
"We never went further than that and only did it a few times but it was still an extraordinary experience."