Tuesday, October 18, 2011

Piri Weepu ordered a Big Mac at Burger King, and got one.

Piri Weepu destroyed the periodic table because Piri Weepu only recognises the element of surprise...

Piri Weepu can touch MC Hammer

Piri Weepu can divide by zero

Some people wear Superman pyjamas. Superman wears Piri Weepu pyjamas.

Piri Weepu once kicked a horse in the chin. Its descendants are known today as Giraffes.

It takes Piri Weepu 20 minutes to watch 60 Minutes.

Piri Weepu CAN believe it's not butter.

If you spell Piri Weepu in Scrabble, you win. Forever.

Piri Weepu can win a game of Connect Four in only three moves.

Piri Weepu can slam a revolving door.

Piri Weepu once shot down a German fighter plane with his finger, by yelling, "Bang!"

Piri Weepu played Russian Roulette with a fully loaded gun and won.

Piri Weepu doesn’t wear a watch. HE decides what time it is.

If at first you don't succeed, you're not Piri Weepu.

In an average living room there are 1,242 objects Piri Weepu could use to kill you, including the room itself.

Piri Weepu and Mr. T walked into a bar. The bar was instantly destroyed, as that level of awesome cannot be contained in one building.

Piri Weepu can set ants on fire with a magnifying glass. At night.

Piri Weepu uses a night light. Not because Piri Weepu is afraid of the dark, but the dark is afraid of Piri Weepu.

Piri Weepu is the reason why Wally is hiding.

Google won't search for Piri Weepu because it knows you don't find Piri Weepu, he finds you.

The original title for Alien vs. Predator was Alien and Predator vs. Piri Weepu. The film was cancelled shortly after going into preproduction. No one would pay nine dollars to see a movie fourteen seconds long.

Piri Weepu counted to infinity - twice.

When Bruce Banner gets mad, he turns into the Hulk. When the Hulk gets mad, he turns into Piri Weepu.

Piri Weepu invented black. In fact he invented the entire spectrum of visible light. Except pink. Tom Cruise invented pink.

The phrase 'dead ringer' refers to someone who sits behind Piri Weepu in a movie theatre and forgets to turn their cell phone off.

If, by some incredible space-time paradox, Piri Weepu would ever fight himself, he'd win. Period.

When Piri Weepu falls in water, Piri Weepu doesn't get wet. Water gets Piri Weepu'd.

There is no such thing as global warming. Piri Weepu was cold, so he turned the sun up.

Piri Weepu once ate a whole cake before his friends could tell him there was a stripper in it.

The show Survivor had the original premise of putting people on an island with Piri Weepu. There were no survivors, and nobody is brave enough to go to the island to retrieve the footage

At night the boogyman checks his closet for Piri Weepu

Did you know Piri Weepu had a role in Star Wars? He was the force!

Some magicans can walk on water, Piri Weepu can swim through land

When nature calls Piri Weepu hangs up

Piri Weepu can eat rice with one chop stick

The sun wears Piri Weepu block

Piri Weepu won the World Series of Poker using Pokemon cards

Cats are allergic to Piri Weepu

Piri Weepu has "Intel inside"

Mosquitos buy Piri Weepu repellant

Ghosts can see Piri Weepu

Piri Weepu can whistle in 14 different languages

Piri Weepu can cut through a hot knife with butter

Piri Weepu once fought Superman on a bet.... the loser had to start wearing his underwear on the outside of his pants

Piri Weepu once drowned a fish underwater

Piri Weepu makes onions cry